REVIEW: Robbie Williams "Reality Killed The Video Star"

'Brain Track-By-Track:
The Return Of Sir Bob
After an altogether too-long wait, Robbie Williams - officially one of The 'Brain's all-time faves - returns with his new album Reality Killed The Video Star (it's like Christmas in November!). Ahead of its release this weekend, we've had the chance to devour it and, of course, are all-too-willing to deliver our opinions.

While right-thinking people recognise his last album Rudebox as a flawed masterpiece that looked to be setting Sir Bob up for a much-needed change in direction, British tabloids and disappointing sales seem to have convinced him it was time to regress to rock ballads. As such he has reunited with former writing partner Guy Chambers and enlisted Trevor Horn (of Frankie Goes To Hollywood fame) as producer.

The result is a competent mixed bag...

Morning Sun
A surprisingly low-key opening to the big “comeback” album, "Morning Sun" is classic mid-tempo ballad Robbie that goes all Beatles halfway through. Lyrically and melodically it probably harks back most closely to I’ve Been Expecting You. Perfectly acceptable, but should have come later in the track listing.

Bodies
The album’s first single may have a killer chorus – which brings a welcome oomph to the album five minutes in - but the Jesus-packed verses are a little lacklustre. What on Earth is the swear word under that beep? Why is there a beep on this version? BAH! Still, this one will probably be looked back on fondly in years to come. And the strings are still awesome.

You Know Me
The second single, this is certainly less polarizing – but not nearly as big – as “Bodies”. It’s mid-tempo Bob again, but sounds suspiciously like it could have been recorded in Vegas in the early ‘70s; we’re talking Barry Manilow-style piano, strings, claps and “shoo-da-bop” backing vocals.

Blasphemy
Wow this is a slow starting album; don’t people normally stuff the ballads at the back? This one is confessional Robbie, with nods to his depression and the stresses of trying to write hits. One of the simplest offerings here, it has really grown on me with more listens. Probably worthy of a teary listen with a scotch.

Who's a happy boy, then?

Do You Mind?
Hang on, what’s this? Rock guitars? Drums? Hey “Do You Mind?” might be laid-back rock, but it’s a stark change of pace to the preceding tracks. While it never quite hits the heights you wish it would, there is no doubt this song will go off live (and yet it was notably missing from his Electric Proms concert the other week). Certainly a possible single, but could maybe do with a bit of amping up in the (very catchy) chorus. Remix, anyone?

Last Days Of Disco
And now what’s this? Now we’re all synth and drumpads and Rudebox-y? How delightful. “Don’t call it a comeback/look what I’ve created here” he sings, seemingly not realising that the reason people are calling it a comeback is because he hasn’t created anything in years and years. Aurally pleasing, but a bit middling.

Somewhere
“Somewhere” clocks in at the grand total of one minute and two seconds. And a thoroughly enjoyable one minute and two seconds it is. So enjoyable that it could have been at least three times this long. He seems to be telling listeners that they don’t need to worry about his love life as they have their own to worry about. Or something.

Deceptacon
This song successfully merges all of the albums influences into one song. Part rock ballad, part swing, part electro, it’s one of Bob’s more complex tracks. As if embracing his very Englishness after years in America, Robbie the witty lyricist is in fine form here. Plus, it’s all tied-in with Transformers – marketing genius! Bob says he overlooked this one for inclusion on the album until Trevor convinced him otherwise. Thankfully! It’s one of the best tracks on the album.

Starstruck
I love strings as much as – possibly more than – anyone, but by this stage in the album Trevor Horn’s overuse of the old string section gets a little tiresome. This appears to be a disco song that is near-impossible to dance to. Well, I suppose you could shuffle. Or just drink more. In a recurring theme, the impressive verses lead to a chorus which doesn’t really go anywhere.

Difficult For Weirdos
Ooh we’re back to electro now. Very Pet Shop Boys, this one (as was “Last Days Of Disco”). It’s a pity that Rudebox didn’t entirely work, because this is a sound that Rob sounds very comfortable with. He even gives some sort of insight into his relationship (one presumes) with whatshername, as he suggests the answer to his life-long love issues was to find somebody as weird as he is. Oh, and he also finally admits to being a lesbian. Another highlight.

Superblind
Not a look back at Bob’s days on the booze, this ballad is about a critical person and … look; I’m not entirely sure what it’s about. I think being “superblind” is not judging people with preconceived notions, and whether he’s talking about an ex or a friend or critics, I have no idea. But when he declares “I’m the genius behind me” I sure did laugh.

"I'm loooooking at you!"

Won’t Do That
Okay, so this one really is about his girlfriend, whatsadoo, and Sir Bob really does sound happy – which is rather nice seeing as that hasn’t happened in a whole lot of his songs, really – and it turns out that he plans on treating whatsachops very well, thankyouverymuch. Plus he knows whatserface must be the one because he’s not jealous any more. Lovely. This could also be a single. I hope he’s writing down my single choices. OR THERE’LL BE TROUBLE.

Morning Sun (Reprise)
We’re brought full circle with an instrumental version, culminating in a rousing chorus, of the first track. He closes with the question “Who am I to rate the morning sun?” As if somehow suggesting that I shouldn’t be critiquing his life’s work. Which is fair enough, but a bit late!

The biggest problem with Reality Killed The Video Star is not the songs themselves, but the sequence of them. It takes too long to kick off, and then only really does in a muted fashion.

What is really missing is two or three massive potential singles, as Robbie himself laments in “Blasphemy”, he has struggled to come up with hits. These songs are all good, but there is nothing that really anchors the album as a whole and it feels as if it floats from one song to the next – often confusingly.

My favourite Robbie is “Rock DJ” and “Let Me Entertain You” and “Kids” Robbie. This album delivers none of him.

One can’t help wondering what might happen if he really mixed things up in the writing department. Working with RedOne or Timbaland might sound very basic, but it could just be awesome. Or, you know, that Gary Barlow guy.

Just a thought.

That said, Robbie certainly does seem to be back on track, and I can always hope that he delivers everything I’d like next album. Right? Right!

You can download an album medley (more accurately "a shabbily pasted together group of bits of songs") HERE.

Scott Keenan
We've Been Expecting Him O'clock